Looking Ahead

LOOKING AHEAD by Wally Dobelis Dr. P. attends an ASCRAP meeting Dr. Paranoia, a frequent contributor, writes: Recently I had an opportunity to attend a meeting of ASCRAP, the American Society of Creators of Realty Action Programs. Although this report may run counter to the Society’s principle of “don’t ask, don’t tell,” borrowed from the international Bilderberg conspiracy, I felt compelled to reveal to your readership all about the new developments in reality TV. The meeting was called to discuss a new proposal for a reality show: “Tales of the Unelected Government,” a cooperative venture. It was based on the recent events in New York State governance, where, after the resignation of Eliot Spitzer, his chosen Lieutenant Governor David Paterson took over. To redress the shenanigans of Democratic Senators Pablo Espada Jr. (frequently indicted for using a medical HMO funds for campaign expenses and not convicted) and Hiram Monserrat (indicted for cutting his girlfriend’s face, and miraculously charged only for a misdemeanor) Paterson illegally appointed a Lieutenant Governor, realtor Richard Ravitch. When Hillary Clinton became Secretary of State, he appointed Congresswoman Kirsten Gillibrand as interim US Senator. Thomas diNapoli of Nassau County’s 16th AD was chosen by the legislature to became NYS Treasurer, appointed for the balance of the term upon the scandal-driven resignation of Alan Hevesi, involving misuse of state transportation facilities et al. So much for the unelected. There was also a suggestion of including Mayor Michael Bloomberg, for having New York’s City Council override the third term limitation in allowing him to run for office, despite the fact that New Yorkers have approved the eight-year term maximum in two elections. The proposed realty program would use state-filmed legislature and government session videos and eyewitness reports, as well as YouTube material. If insufficient, the creator offered to include episodes of New York legislators arrested and convicted for driving while drunk, accepting kickbacks for contracts (sometimes called consultant fees), employing relatives and friends, offering no-show jobs, accepting free vacations and similar perks. As a further extension, he offered such deliverables as interviews with the accuseds’ attorneys, loudly proclaiming the innocence of their clients. A further corollary to the show, dealing with ways of financeers getting investment advisor positions with state and union funds, involving payoffs well beyond campaign contributions, was considered by the group as mundane and depressingly ordinary, though possibly worthy of an episode, as were ideas of presenting banker and mortgage broker family and business lives. A takeoff on Madoff family adventures, suggested in humor, was actually dubbed ethically reprehensible and indefensible, as an instruction set for commercial crime. The proposal received attention, with some concern about nasty reactions from the politicos, but as someone remarked, “this is not the UK, we have the First Amendment to look after us.” It was further mentioned that Keith Olberman has forever been calling people “the worst,” with no repercussions and scant attempts at defense and rebuttal, and that Lou Dobbs of CNN has had lists of perceived economic miscreants displayed on screen several years ago. Moving along, a suggested reality show about the private lives of Mafiosi families was deemed too close to the copyrighted Sopranos, as did several proposed themes on the topic of unfaithful housewives, Randy the mailman, and suburban life, also too similar to Sex and the City. Better reception was offered for a series of private lives of traveling wrestlers, the WWWF variety, male and female, for points in violence with some sex (although skeptics claimed not to have enough reality there to be believable). An extension into free-form kick-boxing, with real blood, was received a bit better when someone offered the free use of the term “real blood,” as an added incentive , utilizing a red bottled fluid trademarked as “real blood.” This scared a few participants, and, although the chairman declared that “no one ever went broke underestimating the desire for sex and violence in American entertainment,” the discussion veered into martial exercise, peoples’ lives centered on sports studios, exercise halls, fitness clubs as trysting places. Social activities with YouTube, Facebook and such for boy-meets-girl excitement were downers, although the interest picked up when job opportunity actions and mean messages were mentioned. The pace picked up when someone recommended a new kind of overlarge family reality show, a category that has had early overexposure. The new one would involve families chasing storms in cars and balloons, and kids getting lost in the process. It almost had a tinge of real life about it. We thank Dr. Paranoia, a critic of virtual reality, for the observations, and Clyde Habermann of the NYTimes, who inspired him. --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Wally Dobelis apologizes about last week inadvertently misstating Iran’s 2002 contribution to the rebuilding of Afghanistan as $500,000. It was actually $500,000,000. It emphasizes Iran’s fear of its Sunni neighbors on its borders, and the need to neutralize them. This is underscored by the recent Sunni suicide terrorist act on five Iranian Revolutionary Guard generals. Shias are not known to do suicide bombings. They should heed President Obama’s proposals, offering peace with its neighbors. The Israeli threat is not idle, they have religious precedent, the blind Samson destroying the Philistines.